Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Pic and Choose: When Oncoming Politics and Actual Real Life Collide

Oft times my old digital camera rides with me in my backpack and I forget it's even there; most of the time I only remember to grab it when the opportunity presents itself to get, say, amusing pictures of cats.



NOBODY PLAYS THE VIDEO GAMES ON MY WATCH



Ahem. Where was I? Ah, yes.

Today, like every other day (except windier), I made my way to the bus stop early in the morning; it was to be another long bus ride to work, but certainly better than trying to drive downtown and then trying to park downtown.

Anyone passingly acquainted with me knows how poorly I handle mornings; even still, I wasn't so out of it that I didn't notice the pronounced increase in gridlock. Construction ahead, I deduced. (Aren't I bright.) But the noisy congregation of ralliers, not thirty feet away, standing around Progressive Conservative candidate Tara Brousseau? That took me a second longer to parse.



My, but what an image. Spring construction snarling a sea of cranky car commuters, their exhaust dissipating no more slowly than their gas budgets in the wake of another record rise -- and then, way over on the sidelines, barely on anybody's radar, a passing reminder of an upcoming election that precious few electorate will be bothered to acknowledge.

I knew I keep that camera in my backpack for a reason.

So right from the moment I got to the bus stop, this morning, I knew what I was going to do today after work: grab the camera and poke around Pembina Highway a bit, to see what election- and non-election-related sights there might be to see.

And seeing as I go by this building twice a day on the bus, I already had my first shot in mind.



Now, I can figure out what they're trying to get at with that slogan -- but doesn't it really seem weird, the first few times you read it? "For Fort Garry For a Change"; is he usually against Fort Garry?

"Hey, Shaun, you wanna go grab a beer and rail on Fort Garry for a while like we usually do?"
"You know what, guys? I think today I'm going to be for Fort Garry for a change!"

To quote George Carlin -- these are the kinds of thoughts that kept me out of the really good schools.




Oddly enough, I later came across what appeared to be an entire deck of cards that was scattered alongside the southbound lane; it seems as though somebody must have thrown the entire deck from the window of a moving vehicle. I must inform you, whoever you were: this is one game of 52-Card Pick-Up that you have lost badly, and that is why it isn't supposed to be played as a travel game.



I always laugh when I see this bus bench. And then I always feel a little bad about laughing. But never for very long.

Put aside the knowledge that it's a real estate conglomerate; going by this display, doesn't it really seem like Royal LePage would actually be a dating service for people with really low standards? Can I honestly be the only one who gets that vibe from that combination of picture and text? And would this really be any more shameful than those stupid, seemingly unkillable Grapevine Personals television spots?



OH SNAP NO THEY DI-IN'T

That is cheeky. That is pure, unmitigated cheek. Well played.

It doesn't show very well from this angle, but they actually put three (!) signs up in front of enemy headquarters; this one visual alone is already more interesting than last night's televised debate was. (Because good lord was that thing a snoozefest. How am I supposed to argue against the notion that this election isn't boring when people have that to work with?)



Yeah, huh. Ouch. I hope you don't have anywhere to be this week.

Sure, this picture displays an unprecedented and disgustingly inflated price for gas with no reasonable explanation for the continued hikes beyond the cheerfully persistent moral bankruptcy of our financial overlords -- but look on the bright side! Two or three months from now, we'll be looking back at this picture fondly!



If couches could talk -- and it's unquestionably for the best that they can't, all things considered -- if couches could talk, I suspect this one would be voicing the symptoms of a major hangover.



"Holy shit that party got crazy last night. Fuck, man. Hey--hey--do you know where my leg went?"



WHAT

WHAT

HOW DO YOU

FOR THE LOVE OF

What gets me isn't that the Value Village decisionmakers probably forgot or were unaware what else was going on May 22nd; what gets me isn't even that most of the shoppers have forgotten or are unaware of what's going on May 22nd. No, the rich vein of cynical amusement being tapped right now sources from the knowledge that -- come May 22nd -- the crowds in that Value Village at any time are going to dwarf the traffic that any returning office is going to see the entire day.

Yes, this is just what Manitoba's voting turnout needs. Competition. The representative legitimacy of our political system is going to be undermined by a fire sale at the second-hand store.

Manitoba provincial politics! So inspiring, you'll barely even know they're there!

1 comment:

Sheena said...

As a Pegger ex-pat, I must say that you capture the spirit of my hometown better than anyone else I've read lately.