Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Winnipeg Cat Has a (Local) Flavour, or: James Howard Uses the Internet For Mischief

Greetings from my lunch break! How are you all doing? Good, good.

A whole week has elapsed between my last post and this one, which is really rather unacceptable, but when a lapse like this occurs you can usually assume that I am either A) tremendously busy, B) tremendously lazy, C) up to something sneaky, or D) all of the above. If none of the above apply, it is because I am dead.

However! The correct answer, in this case, is D -- because I have alternated between being preoccupied and being so tired out of my mind that I fall asleep fully dressed with the lights on, but I've also been surreptitiously working away in my rare free time on a project of such importance (and potential entertainment) that it would have been improper to give it less than my full attention.

(Don't think that I hadn't noticed when both the Sun and the Free Press built off some of my stuff in the past week or two. I'm glad they liked it! And if it means that people start paying attention and coming up with ideas, so much the better; it's not like it was much of a big, carefully guarded secret that the area needs work.)

So what ill-advised madness and calamity am I up to this time, you might ask? Well, I'll walk you through the decision-making process I followed, so bear with me on this one.

This is my cat, Maya; I believe we can all agree that she is adorable.



Everyone in agreement? Good. Moving on, then.

This is the flag of the City of Winnipeg:

Interesting colours, right?

It isn't as classy as Regina's flag, but on the other hand it isn't a trainwreck like Lethbridge or anything. (You ever get a good look at Cornwall's flag? It looks like the Liquor Mart logo.)

So, with that said, this is the template for the popular Advice Dog internet meme that has already spawned dozens of spinoffs --

-- and by this point one or two of you might be blurting out "oh, no" and looking aghast, but please save yourself the trouble. It is far too late to try and stop me, and I am not sorry for what I have done.

Behold! Our civic pride, our local joy -- the birth and onset of Winnipeg Cat!

Winnipeg Cat: the voice of a generation! Some restrictions may apply, check your local listings.

Well, good to have that completed and out of the way. Back to work I go! I'll be spending the rest of the day reviewing and weeding our reference collection and earmarking general collection materials as feature items for upcoming promotional efforts, because -- and I am saying this completely without sarcasm -- I am a legitimate professional with a totally awesome job. Then I'll be off to the totally awesome Priestess concert tonight, and within a day or two I should also have a post up with some substantive and interesting reader response segments. See you then, true believers!


Brant said...

This post is full of awesome.

Anonymous said...

oh man, that's hilarious

Anonymous said...

Winnipeg Cat does it...this is officially my favorite blog on the internets.

Bring back Buckley and Beave!
(I auditioned for MTN Kids News back in the day...didn't get in)

Anonymous said...

Shop at Portage Place!
Get stabbed!

Anonymous said...

This is the funniest thing I have read all week.

Anonymous said...

Pure awesome.

Anonymous said...

winnipeg cat provides the wise counsel that has not been seen in these parts since peter warren left

smell the love. said...

I see a wildly successful line of t-shirts! Nice woik!

Colin said...

You're my new best friend.

Anonymous said...

A triumph!

Simply replace your previous blog with a new cat every day!

Anonymous said...

The new Twitter! Seriously awesome stuff. Nails it.

Anonymous said...

I don't remember the last time I laughed so hard! I think those sum everything up Winnipeg is. Fabulous!

Joanna said...

This post is an epic win!!!

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

so you did all that WITHOUT using

ok, I did the easy part for you.

for everyone else, make some new ones:

KJax said...

Thank you for melting my icy cold regret for being born here.

H said...

I'm laughing so hard I'm wheezing.

James Howard said...

So... should I infer that you guys would like more Winnipeg Cat?

Yeah, I think that's doable. Come back tomorrow night or so.

Anonymous said...

So when are you going to copywrite them and sell them to friggin and live like a king like Ryan North? ALSO GOOD JOB I GUESS


James Howard said...

Ah, don't be silly! Everybody knows there's no money in this 'internet' craze.

Anyway, as a follow-up to my previous note -- I had said that I would put up more Winnipeg Cat tonight, but then I let the project spiral quite out of hand entirely. Come back tomorrow and have a look; I dare say there's a chance you'll like it.

Anonymous said...

LOL thank you for this. So awesome.